Inescapable Discipline – What I’m Reading

“The fact that discipline is occurring in a home doesn’t mean the children are being disciplined in godliness. Often the standard of discipline is merely selfishness on the part of the parents. If you discipline children for selfish reasons, then that’s what they learn. Everything rides on how it’s done. Discipline applied from love teaches the child to avoid the prohibited behavior. Discipline applied from selfishness teaches the child to manipulate others in the same way as soon as he is able (which is usually sooner than later). Parents who are selfish as they discipline can frequently be identified by comments such as, ‘How could you do that to us?’ and ‘Why are you being so rude?’ (by implication, ‘to me’). The child learns that to be a grown-up is to have the right to be self-absorbed.” (My Life for Yours, p. 122-123)