The elders which are among you I exhort, who am also an elder, and a witness of the sufferings of Christ, and also a partaker of the glory that shall be revealed: Feed the flock of God which is among you, taking the oversight thereof, not by constraint, but willingly; not for filthy lucre, but of a ready mind; Neither as being lords over God’s heritage, but being examples to the flock. (1 Peter 5:1-3)
One of the constant tasks of pastors is counseling the flock. In this task there is the constant issue of balance between control and leadership. Many times a pastor knows what the results of a certain course of action will take in a believer’s life and must counsel strongly against it. It is discouraging then, when they do not follow this advice. When a Christian doesn’t follow godly counsel, the results are “not good.” And that Christian normally responds in one of many ways. They may, rarely, admit their fault and continue in their problems. They may repent and return. Many times they end up blaming their problems on the godly counselor (pastor). And sometimes this grows into a bitterness that claims that they couldn’t have followed his advice because, “He’s a dictator!” Or, “He doesn’t think anybody should do anything without talking to him first!”
Pastors must balance between controlling — because they know what the person should do better than that person does, and leading. I think the key is the spirit of the pastor. He is not to lead as a lord, but to be an example.
You Think Too Much! 
You know Pastor V it is all your fault. (LOL)